Terharu.....

terlihat aku painting 1st project ku y umi letak kt tangga,
bile naik turun tgge mesti nmpk.

terlihat aku model2 project ku,
sjk kt uia pj smpai la y kt gmbknye,
umi letak memenuhi meje n atas almari kt ruang tamu,
mcm trophy or medal y org akn berhenti dn lihat.

sememangnye aku nk smpn je sume tu kt dlm bilik ku,
tersorok dr pndgn org,
bt sakit mate je bagi ku..
tpi umi tak bagi.

tah kenape..
hati ni terase sgt terharu...
walau projek2 ku tak bermakna di mate lecturer2 ku,
cukup la ngn penghargaan dr ibuku,
krn ku rasekn ibuku ingin aku hargai usahaku.
atau mgkn ibuku mahu katekan y ibuku menghargaiku.


tq umi.

Dun fuss. Be patient....Its worth it!

'takkan ade sape fhm pe y ak rase, sbb drg tak rase pe y aku rase!'

'i hate this situation! knp aku ni malang sgt?'

Nauzubillahminzalik...

kdg2 kite hadapi kesusahan,
kesukaran y sgt berat
hggakn rase tak mmpu u mnghadapinya ngn yakin n tng.


JANGAN MENGELUH

clarification.
menceritakan masalah penyakit pd dktr bkn mengeluh.
menghebahkan masalah dl kt org lain ngn niat org itu peroleh pengajaran bkn mengeluh.

mengeluh tu bile kita crite masalah kite ngn rase kesal,
rase derita n tak dpt trime hakikat.

2 perkare disebut org2 salaf y soleh:
1st.
'Barangsiapa y mengadukn musibah y menimpanya,
seakan2 mengadukan Tuhannya'
2nd.
4 hal y termsk simpanan Syurga...
sembunyikn musibah,
rahsiakn sedekah,
tak menunjuk2 kelebihan,
dn sembunyikn sakit.

jgnla mengeluh kpd selain Allah.
Trimelh, redhalah ngn ketentuannya.
Allah menilai kesabarn dn usahamu dlm mghadapi ujianNya.

"Sesungguhnya pengertianmu bhw Allahlah y menurunkn cubaan kpdmu
pasti dpt meringankn kepedihan cubaany menimpamu"

SABAR

ketahuilah..
Allah menguji mnrt iman y kau miliki.
bila kdr imanmu brt, Allah akn berikn ujian y lbh keras.
bila kdr imanmu ringan, Allah berikn ujian y lbh ringan.

soo..y dihadapi tu kalo tgk ngn generalnya ringan ke keras?
kalo ringan, we got a long way to go!

"dn org2 y sabar dlm kesempitan, penderitaan, dn dlm peperangan,
mrk itulah org2 y bnr imannya,
dn itulah org2 y bertakwa"
[Al-Baqarah: 177]

ketahuilah...
Allah beri ujian u bersihkn hambaNya dr mksiat n dosa2.
kebaikan2 xkn trcipta kecuali ngn cara ni.
greater difficulties,
with more patience,
insyaAllah...more rewards,
n better chance to enter Paradise :)

"Rasulullah SAW brsabda:
Cubaan ttp akn mnimpa dri org mukmin dn mukminah,
ank dn juge hrtanya,
sehingga dia bersua dgn Allah dn pada drinya tdk ade lg 1 kesalahanpun"

ketahuilah...
Allah sgt syg org y sabar.
Allah beri ujian sebagai teguran.
Allah sentiase mahukn kite dlm keadaan baik n selamat.

"Dan Allah mencintai org2 y sabar"
[Al-Imran: 146]

ketahuilah...
org y sabar dpt blsn lbh baik drpd amalnya.
dilipatgandakannya lg!
katekan laa..
1 amal=10 pahala
1 amal+sabar= infiniti pahala.
MasyaAllah!

"dn sesungguhnya Kami akn mmberi blsn kpd org2 y sabar
dgn pahala y lbh baik drpd y tlh mrk kerjakn"
[An-Nahl: 96]

"Sesungguhnya hny org2 y brsabarlh y dicukupkn phl mrk
tnpa batas"
[Az-zumar: 10]

.............................................................



preparation hati u hadapi result y akn kuar.
huk3...
takut.

"Kesabaranmu itu semata2 dgn pertolongan Allah"
[An-Nahl:127]

salam.

well..that was unexpected! eerr..

mlm semalam,
disbbkn kebosanan y thp melmpau duk umah,
umi pun ajk laa kuar mkn.
mule2 plan nk mkn kt khesas,
tp bile teringt duit y tak byk n kene beli brg lg,
last2 mkn kt mydin jer...
cm bese XP

tgh mkn2 crab stick yee mee ku ngn pnh khusyuk,
tetibe umi tny..
'mardhiah ade boyfren ke?'
nsb aku tk tercekik ke pe..salah dgr kot..
'huh?'
'umi tny..mardhiah ade boyfren ke?'
pndg muke umi jp..
'tak' jwbku selamba n teruskn mkn.

senyap..

serious pulak.
xcaye ke ngn jwpn ku..
'betul, xde...em..umi carikn la u mardhiah..haha (gelak nervous)'
'kalo umi, umi plh ustaz ridhuan tu'..umi senyum lebar.
err....aku cube tggu reaksi umi u gelak,
sbb ku rase umi tgh bt lawak..

senyum..

'hmm...die 25thn' jwbku, cube nk follow lawak umi ni..
'ok la tu 25. bgs kalo pompuan de husband 5/6 thn lg tue. hm2..lg2 die alim'
umi ni biar betul...
aku pndg je hot plate aku y tggl kuah yee mee je.

'nnt die tgr 'ibu, jgn lwtkn solat sbb tgk tv'.haha..sbb bile dh jd menntu kn, die akn pggl mak mertua ibu..bla bla bla (ngn excitednye)'
'ehehe..(glk nervous lg)'

tkr topik..tukar topik! >_<



-flashback-

umi n kwn umi sll p ceramah agame kt masjid abu bakar as-siddiq, ss19 stp ari khamis.
pkl 3ptg.
ceramah agame u muslimat je.
ceramah die based on buku 'la tahzan' or dlm bmnye 'jgn bersedih'
sape penceramahnye?
ye...ustaz ridhuan z.abidin.
eerr..

die 25 thn.
penceramah kt masjid2.
penceramah kt radio gk setiap ari jumaat (tak ingt radio pe)

tiap kali balik umah dr uia,
mesti umi cite betape bestnye ustaz ni.
n sll kate,
' nnt mardhiah cuti boleh la join. duk umah bkn bt pape pun kaaan..'
aku sllnye respon bersahaja je.
maklumla..kepale duk pk psl projek or exam.



-flashback lagi-

soo...khms lps aku de kt umah cz dah start cuti.
umi y excited nk bwk aku p ceramah ustz ni pun ajk la aku p.
pegi jela kan..
terisi sikit hati ni.

msk2 je msjd tu,
aku nmpk kebykkn y dtg ibu2 n ank2 kecik drg.
eeerr...

jeng3..
pastu berdirila srg laki ni kt dpn ibu2 n diri ku y bkn ibu ni XP
'ha..tula ridhuan z.abidin. bla bla blaa..'
'oh..k'
1st time tgk real life. aku lg bermnt ngn ceramah die.
*focus*

kejap2 mesti die akn kate '....ye ibu2?' 'ibu2 cube bygkn...'
eerr....aku bkn ibu.
weeeeek....
...............................................................


haha...merepek2.
ape2 jela umiii..
eh, hari ni ari khamis?
eerr...

2mggu cuti? Lame tuuu....

I have headaches during holidays~~
ive longed for a break from my busy life of assignments,
projects,
exams..
but i cant be at home everyday..
need to escape.




i need to travel somewhere to free my mind,
get the pressure off.
huuu....
i wish i could.

Too Late For Tears

kalo dlm bm nye, sudah terlmbt u air mate.
kenape?
oh, bkn sebab aku putus cinta ke pe xp
tu tajuk pamplet y ku dpt kt masjid Al-Falah
(sklh agame ku..oh! rindunyee...ngee~)
saje nk share.
cuti2 ni kn byk mase u bace.
ooops!
i mean u budak uia jela.

alang2 tu,
all da best u exam bt bdk2 uni lain especially besties ku kt uitm, utp, tylrs, utm!
u know who u r =)

moga dpt studi ngn penuh focus,
dpt jwb exam ngn tenang.
berusahe,
doa,
n tawakal.
^_^

ok2...balik pd tjk asal..
................................................................

Death knocked on a bedroom door.
who's there?
the sleeping one cried.

I'm Angel Izrael,
let me inside.

At once, the man began to shiver
as one sweating in deadly fever.

He shouted to his wife,
don't let the Angel take my life!
O Angel of Death,
I'm not ready yet.

My family, on me depend,
give me a chance,
to go back and mend.

The Angel knocked again.
O man, it's your soul that I require,
I come not with my own desire.

Bewildered, the man began to cry.
O Angel, I'm so afraid to die
Let me remain here as your slave,
Dont send me to the grave.

Let me in, O man, the Angel said.



Open the door
get up your bed
you cant stop me from coming in
Angels can go throught objects,
thick and thin.

The man held a gun in his right hand,
ready to defy the Angel's stand
I'll point my gun towards your head
you dare come in-I'll shoot you dead.

by now, the Angel was in the room
saying O man, prepare for your doom,
foolish man- Angels never die,
put down your gun and do not sigh.

why are you afraid- Tell me O man-
to die according to Allah's plan?

O Angel, I bow my head in shame,
I had no time to remember Allah's name
From dawn till dusk, I made my wealth,
not even caring for my spiritual health.

Allah's commands I never obeyed,
nor 5 times a day I ever prayed.

A Ramadhan came and
a Ramadhan went,
but no time had I to repent.

The Hajj was already obligatory upon me,
but I would not part with my money.
All charities I did ignore,
taking usury more and more.

Sometimes I sipped my favourite wine,
with the flirting women I sat to dine.



O Angel I appeal to you,
spare my life for a year or two.

The laws of the Quran, I will obey,
I'll begin Salat- this very day.
My fast and Hajj I will complete,
and keep away from self-conceit.

I will refrain from usury
and give all my wealth to charity
wine and unlawful women,
i will detest
Allah's oneness I will attest



we Angel do what Allah demands,
we cannot go against His commands.

Death is ordained for everyone-
father, mother, daughter, and son.

I'm afraid, this moment is your last,
now reminded of your past.
i do understand your fears
but it its now too late for tears.

you lived in this world,
two score or more,
your parents you did not obey,
hungry beggars, you turned away.

you two ill-mannered, female offspring,
in nightclubs, for livelihood they sing.
Instead of making more Muslims,
you made your children non-Muslims.

You ignored the Adhan,
nor did you recite The Holy Quran.
Breaking promises all your life,
backbiting friends and causing strife.

from hoarded goods,
great profits you made,
and your poor workers-
you underpaid.

Horses and cards were your leisure,
money-making was your pleasure.

you ate and ate
and grew more fat
with the very sick, you never sat

a little donation, you never gave
that could a little baby save.



you thought
you're clever and strong,
but O man,
you've done enough wrong.

paradise for you? i cannot tell,
the disbeliever will dweel in hell.
there is no time for you to repent,
i'll take your soul for which i am sent.

Salam.

We created robots but who created us?

have u ever watch 'i robot'?
where sophisticated, intelligent robots are created to serve man, to do all the chores around the house n all.

such sweet things, arent they?
program them what to do, n they will do it without questioning.
hiiiiiiii~

but later in the movie, the robots somehow turned on their master and creator and identify them as threats.

huaaa....such disloyal robots! X(
...................................................................

ok.
lets get another scenario.
we are created.
By whom? must i answer it 4 u?

we are created for a purpose.
What's the purpose?

"Aku tak menciptakan jin dan manusia melainkan
agar mereka beribadah kepadaKu"
(Az-Zariyat:56)

There's this 1 article that i came across while wandering around the 5th year archi's studio one morning.
huk3..

come2 read ^_^
.....................................................................................................


Pada suatu ketika di zaman robot sudah banyak di dunia,
terdapat seorang engineer robot yang ingin mencipta satu robot yang paling power sekali di dunia.
Dia membayangkan akan membuat satu robot yang boleh menandingi kehebatan robot Asimo yang bercap HONDA yang mampu menari-nari mengikut rentak muzik.

Maka dibuatlah robot itu seteliti mungkin, dengan sekecil-keci sel hinggalah sebesar-besar organ-organ robot itu dibuat sangatlah teliti. Setelah selesai bahagian pembuatan robot itu, kini tibalah masa untuk robot itu dprogramkan.
Inilah antara program yang dibuat ke dalam cpu robot itu.

[Nama]
MAN-u-SIA LayCar
[Kerja]
1. Cucuk plag 3 in 13 Amp di suis-suis untuk Makan Letrik
2. If 1 is accomplished: Pusing-pusing bazirkan letrik untuk cari suis untuk cucuk plag
3. Ulang 1 dan 2 sampai mati

Maka MAN-u-SIA LayCar itu pun menjalankan kerja yang diprogramkan dalam otaknya itu.
Cucuk, jalan, cucuk, jalan, cucuk, jalan.
Cucuk untuk charge bateri dan jalan untuk cari tempat lain untuk charge balik.

Begitulah kehidupan robot itu untuk 64 tahun, 8 bulan, 16 hari, 13 jam, 35 minit, dan 43 saat.
Pada saat yang berikutnya, wayar-wayar dalam badan robot MAN-u-SIA LayCar pun rosak akibat penggunaan yang berterusan tanpa menservisnya selalu.

Maka tamatlah riwayat MAN-u-SIA LayCar tanpa menyumbang apa pun untuk kemaslahatan sejagat.
Dia juga gagal untuk mengalahkan Asimo yang mampu menari-nari mengikut rentak muzik.

"Maka apakah kamu mengira bahawa Kami menciptakan kamu main-main (tanpa ada maksud) dan bahawa kamu tidak akan dikembalikan kepada Kami?"
(Al-Mukminun:115)

............................................................................................

Dont waste time.
Dont delay things.


salam.

A secret that should never be told...

when was the last time u heard, talked, or read about marriage?
some may have grown sick of it.
why?
its something that u want but u are forced to wait for.

maybe its because most of us are gonna be 20 soon.
marriage is not that far anymore, aint it :P
............................................................................


i, honestly, AM NOT ready for it.
i might have dreamed of being married,
but that's a different story
XP

some even take shortcuts.
how?
coupling.


i sporadically thought of having a marriage as it permits me to have a relationship with a guy,
if possible, with the guy i like
'kalau jodoh tak ke mane kaaan..ngee~'
but being at this age with coming-soon degree,
its far from my grasp.
what to do?
lower my gaze.
resist it.

simple enough......................if u havent fallen for someone.
hiding ur feelings from the person u like is such a headache.
there's so much rule.
u cant couple with the guy.
u cant date him.
u cant talk sweet stuff with him.
u cant even keep on thinking of the guy.

'Rasulullah bersabda:
telah ditetapkn atas manusia bahagiannya dari zina.
ia pasti mndptkn hal y demikian itu.
zinanya mata adalah mmndg,
zinanya tgn adalah meraba,
zinanya kaki dgn melangkah,
dn zinanya hati dgn berkeinginan,
berangan2.'

sometimes i envy them
-the ones that arent tangled in this complicated matter.
but love comes without warning.
it comes without invitation.
its hard to be erased,
hard enough to be hidden.


but...
what He has said, must be followed.
even if it breaks our heart.
it brings tears to our eyes.

' Rasulullah bersabda:
Jika seorang hamba Allah menahan keinginannya dari sesuatu y haram
(kerana Allah),
maka Allah akn mmberikn sesuatu y diingininya itu mengikut jln y halal'
[Al-Hadith]

whats prohibited (haram)
is clearly coupling or boy-gurl love relationship
whats permited (halal)
is obviously marriage
.....................................................................


wont it be beautiful to have a blessed relationship with a blessed person,
the best person u will ever have
after a long, hard time of hiding out ur feelings?
resisting all the temptation of having incomplete relationship?
incomplete without the blessings from Him.

what if u wont end up (by fate) with the person you hoped for?
well....
u would end up with another guy/gurl like him/her or even better!
so..by intrusting the fate of future partner to Allah,
u could save up all ur worries and headaches.
because u deserve the best if u make urself the best for him/her.


'Jalan Mujahaddah....
jalan y sukar u menahan diri drpd melakukan prkre2 y menyalahi syariat'

hm2..
insyaAllah.

'Jodoh kt tgn Allah. pasti Dia akn tunaikn jnjinya...'
that is...
'perempuan2 y baik u lelaki2 y baik' [An-Nur:26]

..Tagged by Bella-Chan..

anda rasa anda hot?

yup...everytime bile habis mndi gune water heater ngn max heat XP

upload gambar kegemaran anda


kenapa anda suka gambar ini?

1st time dpt pic (hmpr) satu fam ngn relanye.
sllnye dpt fam potret time2 raye ngn terpksenye.

sume nmpk hepi! (n nmpk gigi..ngee~)
sllnye msg2 susah nk tnjkkn kehepian..kontrol macho konon.
ngah2

lame dh tak kuar satu fam p jln2.
ni satu prkare luar biasa!



bila kali terakhir makan pizza?

shakey's pizza kt jj wangsa maju.
sedaap~
dhla org tu byr rm7 jer.
tp sbb die blnje donut,
saye tak kisaaaah
hik3



lagu terakhir yang anda dengar?

heart of sword (ending anime samurai-x)
sgt beeees!


Apa yang anda buat selain menyelesaikan tag ini?

Main left 4 dead ngn ane (abgku)


Selain nama sendiri, anda suka dipanggil dgn nama apa?

mar2, batu marmar, caco3, martape
(the one that likes masking tape bak kate bell)
tpi sememangnye ku sgt2 suke org pgglku mardhiah.
so sweeet~

Tag lagi 7orang?

1 aziera nadia
2 mohaimin
3 atikah
4 sobri
5 kayan
6 fairuz
7 farah fadhil

[sile bt ngn sukerela.tiada pksaan :P]


Siapa nombor 1 kepada anda?

aaaaw~~
itu gf aku...eh2..bf aku. bf=bes fren.
suke melepak kt bilik ku.
penceria hidup ku cm nescafe :P
aaaaaww~~
XP


Orang nombor 3 ada hubungan dgn sesiapa?

ahaaaa...ada.
bakal ade hubungan ngn bakal suaminya.
sape bakal suaminye?
haa...itu kite tak tau :P


Kata sesuatu berkenaan pada orang no. 5?

bimaristan.
bimaristan...
hahaah~~


Bagaimana dgn nombor 4?

sob..
bile nk main left4dead ngn aku?
joooooom! ^_^


Siapakah orang nombor 2?

moh?
bestie aku y prasan die budak jepun pdhl mase sepet sebelah jer.
ngeee~~
tp die mmg penggile SLR- sushi lain2 rase X)


Pesanan kepada nombor 6?

same gk...
bile nk main left4 dead?
kite main bertige.
tgk sape hero.
lalalalaaa~


Pendapat anda tentang nombor 7?

oh..
last time jmpe time primary skul.
die baik n sopan.
wii~

How I ended up with those baggy scarves~

[note: baggy scarf is tudung labuh.gagagaa~]


it was my 19th birthday,
my dear sweet 'umi' gave me a lovely 'tudung'.
brown colour...i likeeee~
'mayB ill wear it someday..'
......................................................................


it was Wednesday morning,
i woke up late at 7.30 and realized that i was gonna be late for class which will start at 830. my groupmates n i had stayed up late till 3 smthg to finished up an assignment and prepared for a presentation. and luckily for me, they all agreed to elect me as the presenter,as always. hua3

so, i gotta look my best :P


8.00am

i had this brown baju kurung which i havent worn yet.
'ohya...match pulak ngn tudung y umi bg..wiii~'
so, i quickly put on that baju kurung and start ironing the tudung.
while ironing..
'eh..lamenye nk hbs iron.asal cm besar smcm tudung ni..? O_o'


8.10am

walking distance to kaed-15min! hueh! got another 5min tu pack my things n put on my tudung.
'huh?..tudung labuuuuh..???? >_<'
'xkn nk p kls camni...dah la kene present dpn sumorang.alamak..takde mase dah.
pasrah jelaa..huk3'


830am, LT1,kaed

'MAAAR! asal tudung ko labuh gilee?'
'eh2,mar....smpai seru dah ker?hhhaha'
'waaah...sejak bile ni,mar?'

eeeer....

seriously..
'rase cm dlm kepompong! malu gile..mane la org cm aku lyk pakai cmni..'
but my besties keep on telling me i should be proud of it n continue on wearing it.
but i admit.
it changed me.
.........................................................................................


suddenly i felt controlled..
the way i talk, what i talk about.
i felt like that baggy scarf of mine reminds me of someone,
someone that kept on watching me,
my every move,
every word,
thought,
feeling.

then i realized, that someone is Allah.
so..i always felt that i had to do things the right way.
His way.

but,
sometimes i do feel im not suit for it.
i still have habits that doesnt go along with that piece of cloth.
i have a past full of sins that still haunts me.
im working on it.
what can i say...
people makes mistakes as we are human beings..not angels.


i like this phrase that i read..
'mungkn dsbabkan dosa2 itu..mnjadi satu momentum utk seseorg sgt dkat dgn Allah..'
insyaAllah.


i started wearing it since that day, since the day i 'accidently' wore it by mistake.
or is it really an accident?
hmm...
i have once thought (jz a thought..never took it seriously :P) of trying on 1
but ended up laughing after picturing myself in 1 of those thing.
Probably He heard my wish n granted it.

takdir.
...............................................................................................


1 funny comment:

'mar..ko dah pakai tdg labuh ye? kirenye ko dah tak pakai seluar jeans n pakai bj labuh n kain or jubah jela yeh?'

eerr...
'persoalan di situ..'

mayB i should wait for my 20th birthday and see what umi will get for me.
ahahaah~
..............................................................................................

this post is jz a diary for me. people change through time and i hope i remember why im wearing that cloth and still am.
insyaAllah..

Caring Bro ^_^

hahhaa!
aawww...so sweet <3

dun wori bro.
im glad to be in iium
(for its environment...for architecture? that im not sure..hua3)

1 more week till i reach the end of this sem.
3 more papers to go..